The land of medication

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Merbear's World

*Suicide Trigger Warning*

There are so many levels of depression it boggles the mind.

I am feeling “better” but it’s still a struggle. I am at the phase where I can half smile, crack a joke and somewhat follow a conversation with someone without fading away into my own world. The world where I would rather be dead. Where my soul feels like it went to join the circus (to be a scary ass clown) and my personality has been cleared away, replaced by someone I don’t recognize.

Oh, the disturbing thoughts are still there, but they are more distant and hazy.

I am honestly afraid to be too hopeful. The land of medication, although necessary for my survival, is a treacherous one to travel to say the least.

“One pill makes you larger, and one pill makes you small
And the ones that mother gives you, don’t do anything at…

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