I’m an Introvert, not an A**hole, mostly


Saturday afternoon a good friend of mine (one of the few I would call “good friend”) called me. Me being me, I let it go to voice mail.

“Hey, my band is playing tonight. You should come check us out.”

Worst message ever.

Ok, maybe not ever.

I sent him back a text about 10 minutes later saying that I would try to make it. I waited 10 minutes so it wouldn’t seem like I screened his call.

I didn’t go.

Sunday morning I got a text from him. “Thanks for coming out you a**hole.”

Keep in mind that he is a good friend, so him calling me an a**hole didn’t hurt my feelings. In fact, there are much more creative terms of endearment we call each other. My reply was, “You’re welcome.”

He knew that the chances of me showing up at a local bar on a Saturday night was pretty much zero. He knows that the chances of me showing up at a local bar any night of the week are pretty much zero.

It’s just too much for me for a couple of reasons. For one, there are people there.

Ok, that takes up reasons 1-8.

Also, I don’t have the best hearing. I served in the Army and my hearing sucks. That comes in handy a lot of times, but not when I am expected to socialize someplace where there is loud background noise. I spend a lot of time incorrectly answering questions that I thought I misheard.

Or I end up looking anti-social. Ha!

And when I do hear them, usually it’s conversations I’m not really interested in having. A lot of times it revolves about the things I do in my career. I spend 60 hours per week dealing with my career, why would I want to talk about it when I am “off the clock?”

Anyway, it’s something that us introverts are faced with many times. One of my Friday posts on Twitter read, “friday. Friday. FRIDAY! Not a chance I go out tonight.”

It’s too exhausting. It’s not how most of us introverts recharge. It’s how my Hippy wife recharges. It’s how my six-year old son recharges.

No, my six-year old doesn’t hang out in bars to recharge…that I know of.

But it’s not how I recharge.

I recharge by sitting on my couch. Or chair. Or floor. Or bathroom. Or bed. Or a bubble that I am trying to find out how to create. I recharge with silence. I recharge with a book or even a good movie. Sometimes a bad movie. I recharge with blogging. I even recharge with people watching.

I can be out in public; I just don’t need to be engaged. I can sit for hours and watch other people. Hell, I can sit down and watch Judge Judy or some reality show just so I can see how much better my life is. And quieter.

That doesn’t make us introverts a**holes. At least not for that reason. It just makes us unique, just like everyone is. We are all unique.

Still, I have a lot of friends. Not “good” friends, but friends. I have a very small circle of “good friends.” Those are the people that I trust. Those are the people I would do anything for.

As long as they don’t ask me to go out in public. Just kidding.

Sort of.


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